Are Garth and I the only ones enjoying the NBA playoffs (especially the Western conference games)? You missed a great one if you didn't watch the San Antonio - New Orleans game last night. Too bad Utah won't get past the Lakers. Because I'd love to see Deron Williams up against Tony Parker or Chris Paul. With point guard play at an all time high, Derrick Rose should be the first pick in the draft.

With my NBA hard-on in full effect, I spent the morning searching YouTube for my favorite NBA in-game dunks. There were two that I couldn't find. One was Larry Nance against the Lakers. Like the Chambers dunk, he kept rising above the rim. The other was an Isiah Thomas tip dunk that nobody else has probably ever seen.

So here I share with you the fruits of my productive morning:

Pippen over Ewing


Tom Chambers over Mark Jackson


John Starks over all the Bulls


KJ over Hakeem


Dr J over Michael Cooper


Iverson tip dunk


Michael Jordan over Patrick Ewing


Vince Carter over Alonzo Mourning


Lebron over Tim Duncan

In the past few months our son has developed an obsession with "Ralph's World" - a creepy long haired dude who sings children's music. I must admit that occasionally I catch myself singing "(I wanna be a) Puppy Dog" and "Surfing in My Imagination." But the wingman constantly asks us to put in the CD or play the DVD.

We took him to the park on Sunday. Normally he enjoys the swings and slides. This trip was different. He kept walking towards our car, yelling "Ralph!"

After we got home we gave him lunch. Which he immediately vomited. He continued vomiting the rest of the day.

Then two nights ago, I started feeling ill. I got my ass off the couch, ready to head to bed. But I had to take a side trip to the bathroom. Yup. Vomit. I puked all night and slept on the floor just outside the bathroom. I woke up on that floor with the wingman jumping on me screaming "Ralph!"

Ralph, I did, indeed. Three minutes later I was back in the bathroom.

My wife and the nanny were both ill as well. Nothing beats a diet of chicken noodle soup, Pedialyte, and Jello. I'm a big fan of the orange flavored Pedialyte and green flavored Jello. What, "green" isn't a flavor? I call bullshit. You put that stuff in your mouth, and you immediately think green.

All this barfing got me thinking. How did we all get ill? Food poisoning? Highly unlikely. The nanny was sick too, and she doesn't eat with us. That means..

That girl my little Pampers pimp made out with last week? DIRTY.

Which means I'm going to the park today to see what her mom looks like.

A little over a year ago I read this article in Details. In the past few weeks, and for many different reasons, I've sent the link to several friends. It's a must-read - I have no idea why I hadn't posted this before.

You haven't seen anything until you've joined Bobby Blackjack at a table in Vegas. He plays perfect basic strategy, tips the dealers, and is cordial to other players. He does everything in his power to bring about good table karma. But Bobby Blackjack just never wins. It's truly amazing. He'll have an occasional run where he's up several betting units. But you know. The dealer knows. He knows. It's all going back to the casino.

So this Saturday Bob Blackjack, the horse, will be running in the Kentucky Derby. Just for the hell of it, I've put money on the horse to win (30-1). I wish I could somehow place a wager that the horse would have a commanding lead for the 3/4ths of the race then stop on a dime, lick himself, and finally squat and take a big dump on the track - ending up in last place. Do horses even squat to take a dump? It doesn't matter. I know it already - the money is gone.

The Rooster called me on Sunday and asked why I haven't posted pics of the boy lately. Well, below are some photos. And a quick story.

Every Tuesday and Thursday the nanny takes Wingman to the park to a class. On Tuesdays they run around like maniacs and on Thursdays they paint and draw.

Yesterday my boy developed a crush on a little fair haired girl. And he got his mac on. He obviously inherited his father's "game" gene. Take a look at that boy going in for the kill! He's gonna be unstoppable in a few years.

(Girl's face hidden to protect the not-so-innocent.)

Start reserving spots at the convent for your daughters ASAP!

I went to the driving range today. My first time hitting a golf ball in two years. There were some shots I hit that felt damn good.

The rest? Well, I looked like Charles Barkley, or maybe even Tiger impersonating Charles Barkley. Check out my swing below.





Time for a lesson...

This is the true story... of a young couple... who have decided to live together...and blog about it... to find out what happens when people stop being polite... and start declaring shenanigans...

OddCoupling

As one who surely will enjoy their misery making money off their brilliant idea, I've started selling shirts.

What perfect timing for my Austin project to end. The weather here in Chicago is finally pleasant. The Cubbies are in first place. And I can smoke cigars more often.

I spent some time in the yard this morning, just relaxing, enjoying the nice breeze, and maybe having an early morning wheat ale from the kegerator.

Some of you may have heard of the cougar sightings in Chicago. No, not Diane Lane or Michaelle Ffeiffer - an actual cougar. This happened not too far from where I live, just down the street from the grocery store we frequent. For living in the city we do get some strange beasts. Just last year a coyote wandered into a downtown Starbucks.

While I was on the back porch I saw two cardinals playing in the crabapple tree. I nicknamed them Pooh-holes and Andujar.

Then I shot them.

Not with a gun, you sicko. With my camera. The pictures didn't turn out well. So I moved on to other subjects in the yard.

Including this gem.

I got mad skillz.

It had been a while since I played sober online poker past midnight. Because of a project that went live on Monday, I was only able to play in four BBT3 events.

Since I was no longer hobbled by the ball and chain of work responsibilities, I fired up the Skill Series and cleared the DVR. I watched Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters, How I Met Your Mother, The Hills, Chefography - Wolfgang Puck, and 2 episodes of Landscape Smart. And got me a seat in the Tournament of Champions.