Monday, October 31, 2005
I played quite a bit of poker over the weekend.
Unfortunately, not well.
Friday night I played int he WWdN tourney. Fun times! I sat at the same table as Joe Speaker, Bad Blood, and one of the two Willy Wonka's. (Please email me or drop a comment, and I'll link you up). Two bottles of wine in, I was eliminated. What's worse is that I actually passed out during the cash game. With the laptop on my chest.
I had a -30BB session on Saturday while sitting in a Barnes and Noble cafe. One chick had my number the whole time. She beat me out of my solid hands, and bluffed me off my weaker holdings. Thursday can't come soon enough. It's the day that I can change my Party Poker screenname. I'll be on Poker Stars and Full Tilt until then. (And data mining Party)
Drizz, I hope you didn't catch last night's Full Tilt Poker: Learn from the Pro's. They covered heads up play...
How about them first place Chicago Bears? They just finished the fourth game of the six game stretch in which I predicted a minimum 3-3 record. Thus far they're 3-1. With Favre playing like his first year in Atlanta and the Vikings without Daunte Culpepper for the rest of the season, the playoffs could actually be a reality. The NFC Central is THAT horrible.
Even more shocking is the 5-2 49ers. How?????
Is Teddy Bruschi back in football? Enough already! I'm really starting to hate the worldwide leader in sports. Especially all that crap they put on their web site. The ads, the audio/video. Just annoying.
Unfortunately, not well.
Friday night I played int he WWdN tourney. Fun times! I sat at the same table as Joe Speaker, Bad Blood, and one of the two Willy Wonka's. (Please email me or drop a comment, and I'll link you up). Two bottles of wine in, I was eliminated. What's worse is that I actually passed out during the cash game. With the laptop on my chest.
I had a -30BB session on Saturday while sitting in a Barnes and Noble cafe. One chick had my number the whole time. She beat me out of my solid hands, and bluffed me off my weaker holdings. Thursday can't come soon enough. It's the day that I can change my Party Poker screenname. I'll be on Poker Stars and Full Tilt until then. (And data mining Party)
Drizz, I hope you didn't catch last night's Full Tilt Poker: Learn from the Pro's. They covered heads up play...
How about them first place Chicago Bears? They just finished the fourth game of the six game stretch in which I predicted a minimum 3-3 record. Thus far they're 3-1. With Favre playing like his first year in Atlanta and the Vikings without Daunte Culpepper for the rest of the season, the playoffs could actually be a reality. The NFC Central is THAT horrible.
Even more shocking is the 5-2 49ers. How?????
Is Teddy Bruschi back in football? Enough already! I'm really starting to hate the worldwide leader in sports. Especially all that crap they put on their web site. The ads, the audio/video. Just annoying.
Friday, October 28, 2005
Random Shiznit
- So I have something strange to admit. I really enjoy Freddie. I realize that it has David Silver and Freddie Prinze, Jr - but it's pretty damn funny. Sick. I know.
- I also enjoy "My Name is Earl." See what Tivo has done to me???
- The other day at the gym, my nose sensed a foul stench. It was coming from my gym bag - specifically from my basketball shoes. Today I sought to replace the shoes. Holy shit are the basketball shoes that kids wear today ugly! All sorts of synthetic, moving, glow in the dark parts. There was nothing in solid white with maybe just a subtle logo. Everything was big and bold. I'm a little too old for that shit. And forget wearing black shoes - I look slow enough as it is. Then I saw a simple pair of Adidas. I hesitated before making the purchase, because they are my first non-Nike basketball shoes in twenty years. I'm sure Phil Knight is going to sue me for breach of contract...
- Both of my fantasy teams are 5-2. One of them is in first place. Of course, I do realize that typing this means that Carson Palmer is going to break his arm. Fuck.
- Am I the only person who likes to correct people's usage of "further" and "farther" based on the lesson Jamal Wallace taught us in Finding Forrester? I especially like to do such things to piss of my English major wife.
"Farther" relates to distance.
"Further" is a definition of degree.
You should have said "further."
Jebus, I love that scene
- Is there a way to prevent Party Poker from launching when you're a little bit tipsy? Like some sort of breathalyzer connected via USB and integrated with their software? I was bad last night...
- Spending the weekend in beautiful Rockford, IL where I hope to avoid apple picking while playing this game they call "pokre." Errr, "pochre." Shit Hellmuth, I can't spell it! Rockford Charitable Games - prepare for the hammer!
- Brewing a Belgian ale in a week. Whomever knocks me out of the WPBT tourney gets a bottle of the brew and the Cabernet I made over the summer. The wine is tasting pretty solid, and will be even better come December. I have another bounty in mind, but need to be sure that I can find the prize before I offer it up...
- Was there ever any doubt?
This is going to be my final dirndl post - until Octoberfest 2006, that is. Here are the ones I spared you from over the last few weeks. Damn, I musta been really drunk when I snapped'em.
Dirndl of the Day
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Having a rough day, so I'm gonna take it out on my readers...
Dirndl of the Day
Dirndl of the Day
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
HUC2
Tonight, GCox and I completed our first round matchup in the Heads Up Challenge.
I'm not what you would call a good heads up player. Ditto for my NL play. Put those together, and I'm pretty much teh suck at NL heads up play. I'm the king of second and third places finishes in online SnG's.
I was actually pretty nervous that I would embarass myself. It's one thing to play horribly against a random Internet person. But to do so against someone whose blog you read regularly, and who could tear you a new one for all of poker blogdom to see would be pretty disastrous.
Luckily, I got amazing cards. I flopped a set of jacks, then a set of sixes in the first game. And I even dropped the hammer - with a beautiful flop (see below)! The second game was mine to lose. I actually got pocket aces 4 times! Yes 4 times! In about 100 hands! I won the first two games and moved on to the next round. Then I lost my winnings in a SnG. Nice, eh?
Great playing witcha GCox! Can't wait to do this again. Hopefully we can expand this to include more people in the future.
Bring on Drizz!
Who will hopefully see some more of this:
I'm not what you would call a good heads up player. Ditto for my NL play. Put those together, and I'm pretty much teh suck at NL heads up play. I'm the king of second and third places finishes in online SnG's.
I was actually pretty nervous that I would embarass myself. It's one thing to play horribly against a random Internet person. But to do so against someone whose blog you read regularly, and who could tear you a new one for all of poker blogdom to see would be pretty disastrous.
Luckily, I got amazing cards. I flopped a set of jacks, then a set of sixes in the first game. And I even dropped the hammer - with a beautiful flop (see below)! The second game was mine to lose. I actually got pocket aces 4 times! Yes 4 times! In about 100 hands! I won the first two games and moved on to the next round. Then I lost my winnings in a SnG. Nice, eh?
Great playing witcha GCox! Can't wait to do this again. Hopefully we can expand this to include more people in the future.
Bring on Drizz!
Who will hopefully see some more of this:
Superfan Cam Week 3: Ditka 99, NFC North 4
Nothing says "superfan fun" like three hours of tailgating in the rain before a Bearsss game. In one row of cars, there's probably enough grilled meat to feed whomever it is U2 is singing for these days.
I only snapped a few photos. Unfortunately, a Swerski brother thought that I was choking on a pork chop (I wasn't), gave me the heimlich maneuver, and broke the LCD on my digital camera. Here are weeks one and two.
"Holy geez! Dat porda poddy ain't too comfy."
"Ayyyy! Da two a utes gotta try dese braaatsssss!
"Da ladies all luv me for my body and my mind."
I only snapped a few photos. Unfortunately, a Swerski brother thought that I was choking on a pork chop (I wasn't), gave me the heimlich maneuver, and broke the LCD on my digital camera. Here are weeks one and two.
"Holy geez! Dat porda poddy ain't too comfy."
"Ayyyy! Da two a utes gotta try dese braaatsssss!
"Da ladies all luv me for my body and my mind."
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Monday, October 24, 2005
Drunk Dining
It's 2am. You're drunk off your ass. You have a few options.
Hit a late night pick up bar and hope to grind your way into some troll's bed.
You could go home. But what fun is that?
Then there's a third option - FOOD! Is there any better meal than the drunken-I'm-gonna-barf-this-up-in-twenty-minutes meal?
So here we go, with my list of favorite places to dine after a bottle of vodka and six Jager bombs.
LaBamba Burritos - This is a chain that started on the University of Illinois campus, and now finds itself at most, if not all, Big Ten schools. They're known for having "burritos as big as your head" and for causing many a purchase of Preparation H. There is a location in Chicago, and despite there being a few places with better burritos, I'll return just for the nostalgia. At homecoming a few years ago, I ate there three times in one day.
El Burrito Mexicano - Chicagoans usually refer to this place as "the burrito joint under the el tracks right by Wrigley Field." Yes it does have a name. And it's my current favorite for late night dining. This place is dirty. But in a good way. I usually get a steak burrito with avocado and a large horchata. Fuckin' A - I want one now!
White Castle - There's a White Castle near Trump Casino, and the evening's big winner is obliged to purchase a car load of sliders. I prefer the jalapeno cheeseburger, because the toxic effect it has on my body lingers in my abode for days. Don't need to worry about the wife bringing home side action as long as your territory is properly marked.
Skyline - This was a recent discovery on a recent trip to Cincinnati. All sorts of good stuff here. Drenched in their Skyline Chili. You can get spaghetti with chili and a mountain of cheddar cheese (the 3-Way), a burrito (chili, onions, sour cream, and a mountain of cheese), and my favorite, the Coney. The cheese coney is a hot dog with mustard, covered with, of course, chili and a mountain of cheese.
Eleventh Street Diner - This is a small diner in South Beach, not far from all bars and clubs. They're open 24 hours, and you'll see a great mix of people: chuggers disappointed in not picking up, gay guys disappointed in not picking up, coked up transvestites, hookers looking to pick up. A wonderful cross-section of Americana.
In-N-Out Burger - They really need to expand their locations to the Midwest. Whenever I'm in California I make it a point to eat there. Except for the one time I was there during Lent. I've since changed religions.
Pat's Cheese Steak - On my frequent trips to Philly, I've been known to make the taxi driver go out of his way to take me to Philly's most well known cheese steak joint. Who doesn't love meat, cheese whiz, and fried onions? I haven't been to Geno's (across the street from Pat's), but might give them a try soon.
The Home Stretch - This is another fine University of Illinois creation. They have something there called "the haystack" - a fitting name for drunk grub in a town located in the middle of nowhere. The stack is a big ol' hamburger layered by hash browns and gravy. Yes, I know it sounds disgusting. But when you were 19 years old did you really think about cholesterol or heart disease?
There are a shitload more places that I've enjoyed through the years, they've just escaped my memory. But that's the beauty of drunk food. No matter how many times you've had the meal, it's almost always like your first time.
If anyone has suggestions for other not-so-fine dining, lemme know!
Dirndl of the Day
Hit a late night pick up bar and hope to grind your way into some troll's bed.
You could go home. But what fun is that?
Then there's a third option - FOOD! Is there any better meal than the drunken-I'm-gonna-barf-this-up-in-twenty-minutes meal?
So here we go, with my list of favorite places to dine after a bottle of vodka and six Jager bombs.
LaBamba Burritos - This is a chain that started on the University of Illinois campus, and now finds itself at most, if not all, Big Ten schools. They're known for having "burritos as big as your head" and for causing many a purchase of Preparation H. There is a location in Chicago, and despite there being a few places with better burritos, I'll return just for the nostalgia. At homecoming a few years ago, I ate there three times in one day.
El Burrito Mexicano - Chicagoans usually refer to this place as "the burrito joint under the el tracks right by Wrigley Field." Yes it does have a name. And it's my current favorite for late night dining. This place is dirty. But in a good way. I usually get a steak burrito with avocado and a large horchata. Fuckin' A - I want one now!
White Castle - There's a White Castle near Trump Casino, and the evening's big winner is obliged to purchase a car load of sliders. I prefer the jalapeno cheeseburger, because the toxic effect it has on my body lingers in my abode for days. Don't need to worry about the wife bringing home side action as long as your territory is properly marked.
Skyline - This was a recent discovery on a recent trip to Cincinnati. All sorts of good stuff here. Drenched in their Skyline Chili. You can get spaghetti with chili and a mountain of cheddar cheese (the 3-Way), a burrito (chili, onions, sour cream, and a mountain of cheese), and my favorite, the Coney. The cheese coney is a hot dog with mustard, covered with, of course, chili and a mountain of cheese.
Eleventh Street Diner - This is a small diner in South Beach, not far from all bars and clubs. They're open 24 hours, and you'll see a great mix of people: chuggers disappointed in not picking up, gay guys disappointed in not picking up, coked up transvestites, hookers looking to pick up. A wonderful cross-section of Americana.
In-N-Out Burger - They really need to expand their locations to the Midwest. Whenever I'm in California I make it a point to eat there. Except for the one time I was there during Lent. I've since changed religions.
Pat's Cheese Steak - On my frequent trips to Philly, I've been known to make the taxi driver go out of his way to take me to Philly's most well known cheese steak joint. Who doesn't love meat, cheese whiz, and fried onions? I haven't been to Geno's (across the street from Pat's), but might give them a try soon.
The Home Stretch - This is another fine University of Illinois creation. They have something there called "the haystack" - a fitting name for drunk grub in a town located in the middle of nowhere. The stack is a big ol' hamburger layered by hash browns and gravy. Yes, I know it sounds disgusting. But when you were 19 years old did you really think about cholesterol or heart disease?
There are a shitload more places that I've enjoyed through the years, they've just escaped my memory. But that's the beauty of drunk food. No matter how many times you've had the meal, it's almost always like your first time.
If anyone has suggestions for other not-so-fine dining, lemme know!
Dirndl of the Day
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Vegas, Baby!
I'm officially in for the WPBT event in Vegas. Just booked my flights ten minutes ago. For more details, Bill has the scoop.
I'm not sure if I should be nervous, scared or excited.
But I do know that it'll be fun.
I get there the Friday morning and leave Sunday afternoon.
God, I freakin' love Vegas.
I'm not sure if I should be nervous, scared or excited.
But I do know that it'll be fun.
I get there the Friday morning and leave Sunday afternoon.
God, I freakin' love Vegas.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Dirndl of the Day
Two today
The elusive Asian dirndl
Heyyyy, Macarena
Two today
The elusive Asian dirndl
Heyyyy, MacarenaThursday, October 20, 2005
Dirndl of the Day
I wish I had gotten a better picture of this one...
I wish I had gotten a better picture of this one...Wednesday, October 19, 2005
The Buddy System
I've been playing 3/6 on Party Poker for quite a while now, and have (had) tons of fish on my buddy list. I would search for those who were online, then sit at their tables. And (hopefully) scrape out a few BB's. The list grew and grew, and became quite unmanageable. My buddy list contained players from .5/1, 1/2, and 2/4 - levels I hopefully won't have to go back to playing.
After a spending spree, I'm in the process of (re)re-growing my bankroll. I needed to become more efficient in finding the fishies. So today I did a big buddy list cleanup.
I thought that I would need to do a tedious overhaul. Then I found this thread on importing players from Poker Tracker into your buddy Party Poker buddy list. Praise Jebus!
I wiped my buddy list clean (except for a few non-fishy people who I know in real or virtual life). Then I generated the CSV, just as the instructions said. After running the .vbs (skip to the last page in the thread for the latest and greatest script), I had a nice, healthy, buddy list.
The beauty of this process is that you can filter your fish by any criteria specified in the preferences tab in Poker Tracker. For example, I limited mine to players with at least 100 hands played at either 3/6 or 5/10 (in case I ever move up).
I haven't seen anyone mention this yet, but Party now allows you to have TEN tables open at a time! I don't play more than 3-4 tables simultaneously, as I usually play in front of the TV on my laptop. But what this does allow is for some serious overnight data-mining. Think about it. You can now extract 2.5x as much player data.
Combining the data mining and buddy list harmonization - it's just a beautiful thing.
Take a look at Poker Shark's latest about putting your opponent on a range of hands.
And now...
Dirndl of the Day
After a spending spree, I'm in the process of (re)re-growing my bankroll. I needed to become more efficient in finding the fishies. So today I did a big buddy list cleanup.
I thought that I would need to do a tedious overhaul. Then I found this thread on importing players from Poker Tracker into your buddy Party Poker buddy list. Praise Jebus!
I wiped my buddy list clean (except for a few non-fishy people who I know in real or virtual life). Then I generated the CSV, just as the instructions said. After running the .vbs (skip to the last page in the thread for the latest and greatest script), I had a nice, healthy, buddy list.
The beauty of this process is that you can filter your fish by any criteria specified in the preferences tab in Poker Tracker. For example, I limited mine to players with at least 100 hands played at either 3/6 or 5/10 (in case I ever move up).
I haven't seen anyone mention this yet, but Party now allows you to have TEN tables open at a time! I don't play more than 3-4 tables simultaneously, as I usually play in front of the TV on my laptop. But what this does allow is for some serious overnight data-mining. Think about it. You can now extract 2.5x as much player data.
Combining the data mining and buddy list harmonization - it's just a beautiful thing.
Take a look at Poker Shark's latest about putting your opponent on a range of hands.
And now...
Dirndl of the Day
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Superfan Cam Week 2: Mini Ditka 28, Vikings 3
In case you missed the first week, here you go.
The Bears are back in first place, where they rightfully belong. They're the San Diego Padres of football - a potential playoff team despite a losing record. Even if the Bears don't make the playoffs, at least I have my fellow Chicagoans to keep me entertained. Not with the things they do or say, but with how they dress for these games.
I've always wondered who it was that purchased fan merchandise from Walgreens or what people did with jerseys of players no longer on the team.
Now I know.
"Ain't no way anybuddy else here gots da same orange and blue acid warsh jeans as me."
"Paging Mr Bartman, Mr Steve Bartman Sr."
"Too bad Maaa isn't here. She's got da best facial hair o all ovus."
"Send in da clowns"
"So pissed that I couldn't wear da Salaam jersey."
"Yeah, I'm glad I won da rock, paper, scizzers. And I got da Zubaz too!"
"No one knows dat I smuggled in tree beef sammiches in dis helmet!"
"Dat Kyallll Ordden is jest a liddle guy"
"Antny Esposito gave me dis sweatshirt twenty five years ago and it ain't missed a game yet"
"Deer see da Bears logo on my camo hat and just run away."
"God I love deeez nutz"
The Bears are back in first place, where they rightfully belong. They're the San Diego Padres of football - a potential playoff team despite a losing record. Even if the Bears don't make the playoffs, at least I have my fellow Chicagoans to keep me entertained. Not with the things they do or say, but with how they dress for these games.
I've always wondered who it was that purchased fan merchandise from Walgreens or what people did with jerseys of players no longer on the team.
Now I know.
"Ain't no way anybuddy else here gots da same orange and blue acid warsh jeans as me."
"Paging Mr Bartman, Mr Steve Bartman Sr."
"Too bad Maaa isn't here. She's got da best facial hair o all ovus."
"Send in da clowns"
"So pissed that I couldn't wear da Salaam jersey."
"Yeah, I'm glad I won da rock, paper, scizzers. And I got da Zubaz too!"
"No one knows dat I smuggled in tree beef sammiches in dis helmet!"
"Dat Kyallll Ordden is jest a liddle guy"
"Antny Esposito gave me dis sweatshirt twenty five years ago and it ain't missed a game yet"
"Deer see da Bears logo on my camo hat and just run away."
"God I love deeez nutz"
Dirndl of the Day
Something about the glasses. I was drunk then. Drunk now. So who the hell knows what the attraction is...
Something about the glasses. I was drunk then. Drunk now. So who the hell knows what the attraction is...Monday, October 17, 2005
Friday, October 14, 2005
Time to get back to the Bad Beat Jackpot tables!
Dirndl of the Day
Dirndl of the Day
Thursday, October 13, 2005
The Angels Got Screwed!
This series is halfway over. Anyone who thinks that the ball hit the ground before Josh Paul caught it is an idiot. Catchers KNOW when the ball hits the ground. And if they had any have any suspicion that the ball hit the dirt, then they always tag the batter. Ump blew the call.
Something that amazed me though was Mike Scoscia's behavior after the game. Rather than whine about the call, he said that the Angels "didn't play at a high enough level" to win the game. That's class. It's something we'll never see from the current managers from either Chicago baseball team.
Dirndl of the Day
Not an attractive gal, but her beer handling skills make her a keeper. If I'm ever in the market for a nanny, she'll be the first person I call.
This series is halfway over. Anyone who thinks that the ball hit the ground before Josh Paul caught it is an idiot. Catchers KNOW when the ball hits the ground. And if they had any have any suspicion that the ball hit the dirt, then they always tag the batter. Ump blew the call.
Something that amazed me though was Mike Scoscia's behavior after the game. Rather than whine about the call, he said that the Angels "didn't play at a high enough level" to win the game. That's class. It's something we'll never see from the current managers from either Chicago baseball team.
Dirndl of the Day
Not an attractive gal, but her beer handling skills make her a keeper. If I'm ever in the market for a nanny, she'll be the first person I call.Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Baseball Bet
Yesterday I did something that was definitely +EV for me. I bet on the White Sox. As I've said a lot lately, I hate the Sox, but thought that with Contreras pitching and the lack of rest for the Angels, it was an easy victory for them.
Then they lost. And I couldn't be happier.
I would gladly pay more money to sportsbook.com if it guarantees they don't win this playoff series.
Money - and I didn't even know it
Last night the wife and I attended Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show. It was the final stop on a 30 shows in 30 nights tour for Vaughn and four comedians.
The show was hilarious. Vaughn emceed and participated in bits with additional guests Peter Billingsly, Justin Long ("Dodgeball" and "Ed"), and Keir O'Donnell (the painter from "The Wedding Crashers." Former Bear Steve McMichael made an on stage appearance during the dodgeball skit with Long. Unbelievable how much these guys are able to milk off of ONE Super Bowl (especially since they should have won two).
You might have recognized the first name I listed - Billingsly. He played Ralphie in "A Christmas Story" and is friends with Vaughn from back when they did an After School Special (with Tracy Gold). The topic of the After School special? The dangers of steroid abuse. They actually showed clips of the original show, with Ralphie curling 7 pound dumbbells and Vaughn executing an intervention. Then on stage, Vaughn and Ralphie reenacted the scene. Good stuff.
More good stuff was the talent at the show. I'm not just talking about the comedians, who told jokes about class, race, and relationships. I'm talking about the women. The women to men ratio was probably 7-1. This shocked me because I didn't expect to see too many women because I don't know too many who are into comedy.
Then Mrs DP told me that it's because Vince Vaughn is hot.
HUH?
He's probably 35 lbs overweight, has bags under his eyes and is going to be completely bald within seven years. He's hot??? Did she mean Vince Vaughn from eight years ago?
The Sports Guy wrote about how the Sports Gal hates when people think Jennifer Love Hewitt is hot. I guess that this is the same for me.
Except Jennifer Love Hewitt is smoking.
I can understand thinking that Vaughn is cool, and would be fun to hang out with. He was a great emcee. He's the type of guy who throws the perfect party - makes everyone comfortable and feel a part of the whole experience. But hot? He's not even a good actor! He plays the same part - essentially playing HIMSELF - every time!
(As an aside, I thought that Vaughn was the best guest host while Letterman took a leave of absence a few years ago. If Dave is reading this, you should lok into Vaughn as your successor.)
Half of the women in the audience were scantily clad. Some even wore evening gowns! Fake breasts, cleavage, and ass crack everywhere. Then I realized why the women were there. Maybe they did think Vaughn was hot. But what they probably wanted to do was bang a Hollywood guy.
Which is unfortunate for them.
Because Jennifer Aniston was there and they didn't have a chance.
Imagine how Jennifer Aniston, circa 1997 would have looked in a dirndl. I bet pretty fucking good.
Actually, lately I've been picturing women in dirndls a lot lately. Women on the street. Women in bars. Women I know. I don't know why I put myself through such pain.
Dirndl of the Day
These are from last year, but I had to post them.
I love that one girl is passed out while her friend tries to get into some guy's lederhosen.
She was so busy yapping that I was able to walk by and take this one.
Yesterday I did something that was definitely +EV for me. I bet on the White Sox. As I've said a lot lately, I hate the Sox, but thought that with Contreras pitching and the lack of rest for the Angels, it was an easy victory for them.
Then they lost. And I couldn't be happier.
I would gladly pay more money to sportsbook.com if it guarantees they don't win this playoff series.
Money - and I didn't even know it
Last night the wife and I attended Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show. It was the final stop on a 30 shows in 30 nights tour for Vaughn and four comedians.
The show was hilarious. Vaughn emceed and participated in bits with additional guests Peter Billingsly, Justin Long ("Dodgeball" and "Ed"), and Keir O'Donnell (the painter from "The Wedding Crashers." Former Bear Steve McMichael made an on stage appearance during the dodgeball skit with Long. Unbelievable how much these guys are able to milk off of ONE Super Bowl (especially since they should have won two).
You might have recognized the first name I listed - Billingsly. He played Ralphie in "A Christmas Story" and is friends with Vaughn from back when they did an After School Special (with Tracy Gold). The topic of the After School special? The dangers of steroid abuse. They actually showed clips of the original show, with Ralphie curling 7 pound dumbbells and Vaughn executing an intervention. Then on stage, Vaughn and Ralphie reenacted the scene. Good stuff.
More good stuff was the talent at the show. I'm not just talking about the comedians, who told jokes about class, race, and relationships. I'm talking about the women. The women to men ratio was probably 7-1. This shocked me because I didn't expect to see too many women because I don't know too many who are into comedy.
Then Mrs DP told me that it's because Vince Vaughn is hot.
HUH?
He's probably 35 lbs overweight, has bags under his eyes and is going to be completely bald within seven years. He's hot??? Did she mean Vince Vaughn from eight years ago?
The Sports Guy wrote about how the Sports Gal hates when people think Jennifer Love Hewitt is hot. I guess that this is the same for me.
Except Jennifer Love Hewitt is smoking.
I can understand thinking that Vaughn is cool, and would be fun to hang out with. He was a great emcee. He's the type of guy who throws the perfect party - makes everyone comfortable and feel a part of the whole experience. But hot? He's not even a good actor! He plays the same part - essentially playing HIMSELF - every time!
(As an aside, I thought that Vaughn was the best guest host while Letterman took a leave of absence a few years ago. If Dave is reading this, you should lok into Vaughn as your successor.)
Half of the women in the audience were scantily clad. Some even wore evening gowns! Fake breasts, cleavage, and ass crack everywhere. Then I realized why the women were there. Maybe they did think Vaughn was hot. But what they probably wanted to do was bang a Hollywood guy.
Which is unfortunate for them.
Because Jennifer Aniston was there and they didn't have a chance.
Imagine how Jennifer Aniston, circa 1997 would have looked in a dirndl. I bet pretty fucking good.
Actually, lately I've been picturing women in dirndls a lot lately. Women on the street. Women in bars. Women I know. I don't know why I put myself through such pain.
Dirndl of the Day
These are from last year, but I had to post them.
I love that one girl is passed out while her friend tries to get into some guy's lederhosen.
She was so busy yapping that I was able to walk by and take this one.Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Poker Stars bonus
This morning I got an email from PokerStars that I can receive a 25% redeposit bonus. PokerStars rarely offers bonuses. My guess is that the see an opportunity to increase their player base because of Party Poker's circumcision (deskinning).
Hockey
Hockey's back? You don't say! I've never been into hockey. It's a sport that's difficult to watch on television, because you can't see the freakin' puck. And the fights slow the game down too much. Oh, and I'd have to watch the Blackhawks - and only when they're on the road since home games, last I checked, aren't televised in Chicago.
Quick hockey story that just came to mind. A few years ago, a friend from work told me about how he picked a girl up from a bar. He was giving it to her doggy style with the Blackhawks game on television.
There was a goal and he said, "Ooooooooooooooh, Daze!"
Outraged, she disengaged and left his apartment.
Go Angels!
I was rooting for the Yankees, because that lineup could have done bad bad things to the White Sox rotation. The Angels can score in a ton of ways and hopefully pull it off. If not, then the Cards will whoop up on the Sox.
Dirndl of the Day
She brought me my first beer at this year's Oktoberfest, and will forever have a special place in my heart. She's just adorable.
This morning I got an email from PokerStars that I can receive a 25% redeposit bonus. PokerStars rarely offers bonuses. My guess is that the see an opportunity to increase their player base because of Party Poker's circumcision (deskinning).
Hockey
Hockey's back? You don't say! I've never been into hockey. It's a sport that's difficult to watch on television, because you can't see the freakin' puck. And the fights slow the game down too much. Oh, and I'd have to watch the Blackhawks - and only when they're on the road since home games, last I checked, aren't televised in Chicago.
Quick hockey story that just came to mind. A few years ago, a friend from work told me about how he picked a girl up from a bar. He was giving it to her doggy style with the Blackhawks game on television.
There was a goal and he said, "Ooooooooooooooh, Daze!"
Outraged, she disengaged and left his apartment.
Go Angels!
I was rooting for the Yankees, because that lineup could have done bad bad things to the White Sox rotation. The Angels can score in a ton of ways and hopefully pull it off. If not, then the Cards will whoop up on the Sox.
Dirndl of the Day
She brought me my first beer at this year's Oktoberfest, and will forever have a special place in my heart. She's just adorable.Monday, October 10, 2005
A morning of 08
I woke up a little early. Breakfast? Nah. Give me a coffee and a Party Poker $20 O8 MTT. I pretty much folded and nut peddled my way into the money. It's amazing to me how many people will raise with a hand with AK87 - offsuit.
Battlegrounds
Am I the only person out there who watches Nike Battlegrounds on MTV2? This is the second season for BG. Last year it was a one on one basketball tournament, pitting representatives from cities around the world. The most entertaining battle was when an Italian guy got whooped by one of Philly's best ballers. No contest.
This season, Chicago and New York basketball players face each other. They've had tryouts and have finally cut each team down to ten players. After two weeks of preparation, NYC and Chi-town face each other in Akron, Ohio. City sound familiar?
It's the home of LeBron James, the host for the big battle. Andre Iguodala and Tim Hardaway assist in the Chicago selection. (Interesting, because Iguodala isn't from Chicago. He's from Springfield, 2.5 hours away.) Ben Gordon helps the NYC coaches.
One of my favorite sequences was when Iguodala said something like "we need tough guys inside and smarter, more refined players on the outside." Also known as, big brothers inside, and crackers outside.
I paid more attention to the Chicago crew, of course. There was one prima donna, Nate Minnoy, who showed up late for practice. He also sulked while on the bench and didn't hustle while on the court. Despite possessing the most talent of all the players trying out, he was cut. And here was the best part. When he left the inner city gym, he was driving a Lexus SUV. He's attending Purdue this fall. Let's see if there are any recruiting investigations...
The Chicago coach was pretty cool. The ghetto Gene Hackman. He stressed teamwork, and set a great example for the team. He challenged them all to run five miles. WITH HIM! This guy was at least 20 lbs overweight, and motivated the team to complete the run.
The New York team has an Asian guy. Guy can shoot, and his teammates respect his game. He made the team ahead of a lot of more athletic players. New York is also trying to make a well-rounded team.
I'm looking forward to the end of the six part series.
Of course, as I complete typing this, I realize that I might be the only one.
But you're not here for the bad reality TV review. You're here for...
The Dirndl of the Day
Maybe I'll post a beast tomorrow... I realized the other day that the dirndl pics were an opportunity to win Bill's Hammer competition or have some cleavage give a shout out to Al. I failed.
I woke up a little early. Breakfast? Nah. Give me a coffee and a Party Poker $20 O8 MTT. I pretty much folded and nut peddled my way into the money. It's amazing to me how many people will raise with a hand with AK87 - offsuit.
Battlegrounds
Am I the only person out there who watches Nike Battlegrounds on MTV2? This is the second season for BG. Last year it was a one on one basketball tournament, pitting representatives from cities around the world. The most entertaining battle was when an Italian guy got whooped by one of Philly's best ballers. No contest.
This season, Chicago and New York basketball players face each other. They've had tryouts and have finally cut each team down to ten players. After two weeks of preparation, NYC and Chi-town face each other in Akron, Ohio. City sound familiar?
It's the home of LeBron James, the host for the big battle. Andre Iguodala and Tim Hardaway assist in the Chicago selection. (Interesting, because Iguodala isn't from Chicago. He's from Springfield, 2.5 hours away.) Ben Gordon helps the NYC coaches.
One of my favorite sequences was when Iguodala said something like "we need tough guys inside and smarter, more refined players on the outside." Also known as, big brothers inside, and crackers outside.
I paid more attention to the Chicago crew, of course. There was one prima donna, Nate Minnoy, who showed up late for practice. He also sulked while on the bench and didn't hustle while on the court. Despite possessing the most talent of all the players trying out, he was cut. And here was the best part. When he left the inner city gym, he was driving a Lexus SUV. He's attending Purdue this fall. Let's see if there are any recruiting investigations...
The Chicago coach was pretty cool. The ghetto Gene Hackman. He stressed teamwork, and set a great example for the team. He challenged them all to run five miles. WITH HIM! This guy was at least 20 lbs overweight, and motivated the team to complete the run.
The New York team has an Asian guy. Guy can shoot, and his teammates respect his game. He made the team ahead of a lot of more athletic players. New York is also trying to make a well-rounded team.
I'm looking forward to the end of the six part series.
Of course, as I complete typing this, I realize that I might be the only one.
But you're not here for the bad reality TV review. You're here for...
The Dirndl of the Day
Maybe I'll post a beast tomorrow... I realized the other day that the dirndl pics were an opportunity to win Bill's Hammer competition or have some cleavage give a shout out to Al. I failed.
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Party Poker Fish Food
As if seeing 60% of flops weren't enough, the fish at Party poker can now bet on if the flop will be all one color. Time to reload the account!
Oh crap... Blackjack is now accessible from the Party tables too. Fuck me.
Oh crap... Blackjack is now accessible from the Party tables too. Fuck me.
Friday, October 07, 2005
I'm finally back in the swing of things. The last two nights I cashed in 7 of 10 SnG's, even taking first in two. Makes up for the o-fer on Tuesday.
After two weeks of boozing and "other stuff," I've been drinking nothing but water and coffee. I don't think I could even look at a beer right now. Should be ready to go in a few days. I hope.
But let's talk baseball. I really hate the fucking White Sox. Despise them. Fuck cheering for a Chicago team just because they're from my home town. If the White Sox make it to the World Series, I'm cheering for the NL team. Even if it's the Cardinals. Shit, I'd even wear a Cardinals hat, with "I <3 Pooh-Holes" written on the back.
One team I'm cautiously excited about is Da Bears. That's the FIRST PLACE CHICAGO BEARS. At 1-2. Yowza. The NFC North is that bad. Here's who they play the next six games: Browns, Vikings, Ravens, Lions, Saints, 49ers. Is there a team in that list that they shouldn't beat? Maybe the Saints? The worst they should do is 3-3 during that stretch. And that should be enough to stay in first. My Super Bowl Shuffle will set you free...
Ten days til the next Superfan Cam. While I was gone, there was a home game, but the wife was too chicken-shit to snap any shots. I'll make sure that the next batch makes up for Mrs DP's cowardice.
Fantasy teams are 2-2 and 3-1. I'm going to adopt Carson Palmer.
And now on to...
Dirndl of the Day
The chick from yesterday is going to age into this one. Monday I'll post one of my faves. I promise. Oh, and next week will display an "ethnic dirndl" or two...
After two weeks of boozing and "other stuff," I've been drinking nothing but water and coffee. I don't think I could even look at a beer right now. Should be ready to go in a few days. I hope.
But let's talk baseball. I really hate the fucking White Sox. Despise them. Fuck cheering for a Chicago team just because they're from my home town. If the White Sox make it to the World Series, I'm cheering for the NL team. Even if it's the Cardinals. Shit, I'd even wear a Cardinals hat, with "I <3 Pooh-Holes" written on the back.
One team I'm cautiously excited about is Da Bears. That's the FIRST PLACE CHICAGO BEARS. At 1-2. Yowza. The NFC North is that bad. Here's who they play the next six games: Browns, Vikings, Ravens, Lions, Saints, 49ers. Is there a team in that list that they shouldn't beat? Maybe the Saints? The worst they should do is 3-3 during that stretch. And that should be enough to stay in first. My Super Bowl Shuffle will set you free...
Ten days til the next Superfan Cam. While I was gone, there was a home game, but the wife was too chicken-shit to snap any shots. I'll make sure that the next batch makes up for Mrs DP's cowardice.
Fantasy teams are 2-2 and 3-1. I'm going to adopt Carson Palmer.
And now on to...
Dirndl of the Day
The chick from yesterday is going to age into this one. Monday I'll post one of my faves. I promise. Oh, and next week will display an "ethnic dirndl" or two...
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Dirndl of the Day
Some of the pics are fuzzy because
1. I was drunk.
2. Felt kinda perverted taking pics of ladies while they weren't looking and snapped the shots quickly and ran away.
I think I got nipple on this one. What do you guys think? (Click on photo to enlarge)
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Last night I attempted to make my triumphant return to Party Poker. 5 SnG's (3 NLHE, two 08), ZERO cashes. Bubbled three times. Ouch.
Dirndl of the Day
Dirndl of the Day
Monday, October 03, 2005
So I'm back. Less than 24 hours ago, I returned from my ten day trip from Barcelona to Heidelberg to Munich. Unfortunately my laptop fried on me, and I wasn't able to blog about the crazy things that happened. I've forgotten a lot of things that occurred, but here are some quick notes.
- Do you realize that nobody I talked to in Germany everheard of the Sound of Music? Might sound shocking until you realize that they probably banned it from theaters.
- We asked a bouncer at a Russian bar in Munich how he spoke English so well. His answer? "I studied it in KGB school fifteen years ago." Scary.
- At the Munich airport I was selected for additional screening. I was pissed, until I realized that the screener wasn't wearing gloves. And NOTHING in my bag was clean. In fact, some articles of clothing were worn two to seven times during my stay. The highlight was when she went through a beer mug that I stuffed with dirty sweat socks. She took every sock out. All eight of them.
- German food sucks. I hate potatos. I had mystery sausages. The best meals I had there were Indian and Mexican. Go figure.
- I went 36 hours only consuming pretzels and beer.
- The toilets in some of the Oktoberfest tent stalls were actually self-cleaning. Just a beautiful thing. After flushing, the seat would rotate through a box that contained a sponge and cleaning solution. We need those here in the US.
The thing I most looked forward to on this, my third trip to Oktoberfest, was German women in dirndl. So now, for you my dear reader, I present to you the "Dirndl of the Day." Every weekday in October, I'll post a photo of a woman in a traditional Bavarian dress. It'll be a cross-section including the good, the bad, and occasionally the repulsive. So let's kick it off with my favorite. (All of these came from my own camera)
