The Ohio State game just ended - I'm hoping that they take it all. IMHO there were some really weak foul calls against Oden. The dude is a monster. But I have one problem with him. He seems to lumber up and down the court. I don't know if this is a lack of conditioning from his injury, or just disinterest.

But anyway, the title of this post has nothing to do with the NCAA tourney.

Today, my friends and I won the St Patrick high school alumni 3 on 3 tournament. I had one sick game where I scored nine out of the team's fifteen points (including 4-4 from the arc).

Time to cheer on the Gators - even though I'm not a big fan. I just want to see a really good championship game.

Oh, and today I taught the boy how to dribble left handed. Yeah, he's just six months old. But it's never too early!

My flight back to Chicago from Philly has once again been delayed cancelled. I'm standby for the next flight - let's see how that goes. I don't mind business travel - it really isn't that bad. Sure, it gets rough sleeping in hotel rooms, away from the wife and child. But I knew when I accepted this position that I'd be on the road a lot.

There are two things that do chap my hide.
1. Delays: I try to have my entire trip planned well ahead of time. Dinners, nights at the gym, trips to the mall. When a flight is delayed by more than two hours, it really throws a wrench into things.

2. Marriott's high speed Internet access: I've stayed at four different Marriott properties in the last two weeks, and have found that each hotel does not allow Full Tilt Poker to connect to the servers! I have no money in PokerStars (which does get out) and have to resort to even more porno than usual to pass the time. And staying at another hotel chain is NOT an option. I'm a Marriott whore.

~

Last Thursday night after tearing up DC with Garth I slept really well (about nine hours) - and not just because of all the adult beverages that were consumed. I remember dreaming about being on an island, enjoying the sound of waves crashing upon rocks. When I woke up, I realized the reason for my dreams. I had left the bathroom faucet running all night. Nine hours.

At least I brushed my teeth.

~

I spent the last two weeks babysitting two guys from our law firm's Bangalore office. The only food they would eat? Indian food! I'm a big fan of Indian food. But every night??? Finally, I got sick of chauffering them to Indian joints and made them eat with me at Morton's. That's right. I took two vegetarians to a steakhouse.

After we were seated, they asked me what every item on the menu was. I said, "Hang on, they'll do something to help you out in a few minutes." One of them replied, "Do they have picture menus here?" I grinned.

I ordered a glass of Cabernet and they each ordered Bud Lights. Then the waiter came out and brought the visual aids for my fellow attorneys - big ass raw pieces of meat. I wish I could have taken a photo of their faces. They declined on the beef, but ordered a few vegetable sides and lobster bisque. I delightfully ordered a rare New York Strip Steak. Yummy.

~

Today came the karmic payback.

The first week of May, I have to go to the Bangalore office.

~

I played basketball with some partners at the firm yesterday. I completely schooled one of them. Not sure if that was a good idea...

~

Monday morning my flight 6:30AM flight was delayed. I spent two hours asleep, while the guy in the middle seat caught up on a year's worth of Dilbert's:



It's about 20 hours of travel to India. I knew that I should have taken those Dilbert's when he was done!

~

I'm into my fifth beer during this delay.

I've already seen three crying women at this airport. And this time it isn't even my fault!!!

~

In October 2003, my friend Perry and I went to Miami for game 5 of the NLCS. The Cubs won, leaving two games in Chicago with Prior and Wood as the starters. The evening of that game was our last night in town, so we tore it up with a friend who lived down there. It was a night of much celebration, where we kept chanting the number of outs needed to reach the World Series.

The following morning at the airport was rough. We went directly from a bar to the airport. After a half hour nap at the gate, we finally boarded the plane. I (with United 1K status) was in first class, Perry wayyyyyy back in the rear.

I was almost asleep in my seat when someone tapped my shoulder and said, "Mr DP, please come with me." It was a United representative. I followed her onto the jetway, worried that she had figured me to be a blonde Danish terrorist. She then said, "I'm a United customer service rep. I received word that this plane isn't taking off anytime soon due to problems with the left engine. Because of your loyalty to United, we've already booked you on another flight in first class, to Chicago, through Washington Dulles. It's your call. You would arrive in Chicago two hours before any other flight out of Miami. All you have to do is grab your bags, and the seats are yours."

I screamed "SOLD!" and grabbed those bags as quickly as possible.

So aside from the mileage and upgrades, there is some benefit to the frequent travel.

~

My fantasy baseball team is gonna kick some serious ass. I heart it.

~

Next week: Philly (just one night with potential for fantastic stories)
Week after that: Philly
Week after that: Copenhagen
Week after that: Atlanta (tentatively)
Week after that: India

Including personal travel, that makes ten consecutive weeks flying out of O'Hare. 1K status here I come!

I started this week in Philly, drove to DC for a evening of tomfoolery with Garth, and am currently in McLean, Virginia.

Garth and I kicked off last night enjoying the happy hour specials (booze and sushi) at Cafe Asia in DC. Next thing I knew, I was tipsy enough that I probably would have let Tony LaRussa be my designated driver. Garth was in pretty good shape as well. But not drunk enough to go home with the dude who hit on him.

Seriously Garth, that guy WANTED you.

Still feeling a bit of a hangover, I left the office a little early today. I'm taking some time to (in no particular order): watch porno, play poker, catch up on blog reading, take a nap, and watch some more porno.

I spent a lot of time at Betty Underground - she's written a lot about her business travels. Good stuff. One of her posts reminded me about something that happened recently.

Last week on the return trip from Germany, I was stopped by security at Frankfurt airport for having a container of liquid greater than three ounces. I was really confused - until the security guy showed me the offending container. A big-ass jar of Nutella. (The Nutella there is much better than in the US) He said it was a cream and that I couldn't take it through security. So I opened it up, stuck two fingers in the jar, licked my fingers clean, and threw the rest into the trash.

Next week: Philly
Week after: Philly
Week after: Philly
Week after: Copenhagen
Week after: Home! (I think)

It's 6am, and of course, I'm at the airport. Last week I saw Antoine Carr in the United lounge. Or was it Tyrone Corbin? It was one of those two cats.

The NCAA tourney is in progress. Although it hasn't been full of madness, it's been fantastic because of the competitive second round games. This is likely due to so few upsets in the opening round. I love the tourney. For eight years, I spent the opening weekend in Vegas, staying up all night to reserve a spot in the sports book so that I could wager on every game.

This morning I chatted with a college baller in the airport security line - Dukie Jon Scheyer (sporting a nice shiner). Scheyer is one of the most celebrated high school players in Illinois history. Of course, he turned down a chance to play for the Illini to go to Duke. So our conversation went like this:
Me: Good season Jon. Especially that Carolina game.
Scheyer: Thanks, I'm just sad it had to end so quickly.
Me: Well, you know, things would have been different if you had gone to Illinois.
Scheyer: True. I probably would have been left for dead in Jamar Smith's car!
Me: Good thing for you Bruce Weber is such a shitty recruiter!

OK, the conversation didn't exactly go like that. But it could have.

~

One of the benefits of moving form condo life to a house is that you can just let your dog out into the yard. No need to go on walks and use the plastic bag to pick up her waste.

Yesterday was the first day that the ground wasn't wet or covered with snow.

Yes, the day I hoped would never come.

Dogshit day.

I spent an hour and a half picking up poop in all shapes, sizes, colors, and textures. In the end, it all probably weighed about eighty pounds.

Have a nice breakfast!

... my son dresses better than you do:















~

... I'm alive and still enjoy the firewater. The boy enjoyed his first flights over the weekend. We went to South Beach for my brother's wedding. I gave an incoherent, drunken, at times funny, mostly offensive best man's speech. Two of my best purchases over the weekend? Bottle service at the Delano pool bar and a bottle of Dewar's as the bar at the wedding reception was closing.

~

... I still enjoy the gambling. I've given up the NL ring games on Full Tilt. I'm back to playing LHE. I'm much more profitable there, especially with the crutch assistance Poker Tracker provides.

~

... I'm rooting for my Illini to lose in the NCAA tourney. I can't stand watching this team play. No intelligent players. No talent. Just a bunch of athletes who don't know how to play. And a head coach who allows his players to break the law. This coach, despite having been in the NCAA championship game two years ago, can't get a decent recruit to save his life.

~

... I still enjoy a good lap dance. Let's make this happen sometime in the next two weeks, Reverend Al!


~

... I'm going to smuggle in some more Cuban contraband when I return from Germany on Friday. I'm open to suggestions.

~

... Chicks in South Beach dig five month old babies. Best. Wingman. Ever.

~

... Yes, those are Cole Haans he's sporting in the first pic of this post.

1. Slices by Paul McGuire I'd spent most of my time partying hard doing blow with C-List actors while avoiding the daylight and roaming the city late at night during one of the most rowdy benders I'd undertaken in the past few years. We were vampires, sleeping during the days and partying every night until sunrise. I would not crash until 6 AM and by the time I'd wake up, everyone on the East Cast was leaving work for the day... More

2. The Next Block by Joe Speaker The crowd was a stew of unwashed urchins. My kind of people: musicians, writers and hustlers. Feast or famine in this town; the middle class doesn't pass the velvet rope, or lead the newscasts. Sally from Chatsworth is home making fucking meatloaf... More

3. Killing Independent George by Wil Wheaton We played on for another few levels, the clatter of shuffling chips frequently interrupted by the TD announcing the exit of famous actor after famous actor. I will admit that it felt good to be outlasting them., though I will also admit that it was the most Pyhrric of Pyhrric victories: where it really counts in Hollywood, they all have their names on call sheets, while I have mine on a blog... More

4. Everything You Need to Know About Driving in LA by Change100 In order to become a true L.A. driving warrior, you will sometimes have to be the asshole. This doesn't mean you're a bad person -- it only contributes to your overall savviness. By understanding that this attitude is just an unfortunately necessary part of your own survival, inner peace will come much easier... More

5. 15 Seconds by Dan Keston With minimal experience and a microscopic budget, I found a way to make a movie about kids and guns that was not only interesting enough to be one of sixteen selections out of five-thousand entries at the most prestigious festival in the world, but also the topic of a story on NPR and the lovechild of the largest gun lobby in Washington... More

6. Three Strikes and You're In by Dr. Tim Lavalli It was then that I realized I may have made a mistake trying to have a 'break-up' dinner here. Becca's gastronomic creations always put me at ease but ease was not the best place for easily ending a relationship. Besides the vaunted 'do it in public break-up' was a cowardly way out... More

On Friday I returned from Germany on Friday. The trip wasn't fun - but wasn't dull. Many nights were spent getting to know Katrin at the hotel bar. Fine. Piece. O. Ash. She poured many fine beers and helped me light a cigar or fifteen.

Speaking of which, I'd like to thank Customs and Immigrations Officer Perez. As he was reviewing my passport and stamping my declaration form, he said to me, "Sir, you might want to hide 'those' a little better next time you fly back into America."

He was referring to the contraband - Cohiba Esplendidos - that were in my inside coat pocket. He didn't confiscate them, nor did he alert any of the other officers to what was in my possession.

You, good sir, are a real American hero.

Also, thanks for not searching my luggage...


(Not in picture - Bolivar Coronas)

This week: Miami
Next week: Germany
The next week: Philly/DC
The week after that: Philly