donkeypuncher: The Legend of Bob Blackjack

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The Legend of Bob Blackjack

You haven't seen anything until you've joined Bobby Blackjack at a table in Vegas. He plays perfect basic strategy, tips the dealers, and is cordial to other players. He does everything in his power to bring about good table karma. But Bobby Blackjack just never wins. It's truly amazing. He'll have an occasional run where he's up several betting units. But you know. The dealer knows. He knows. It's all going back to the casino.

So this Saturday Bob Blackjack, the horse, will be running in the Kentucky Derby. Just for the hell of it, I've put money on the horse to win (30-1). I wish I could somehow place a wager that the horse would have a commanding lead for the 3/4ths of the race then stop on a dime, lick himself, and finally squat and take a big dump on the track - ending up in last place. Do horses even squat to take a dump? It doesn't matter. I know it already - the money is gone.

# posted by donkeypuncher : Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Comments:

I'm thinking it's going to be an impressive start for Bob Blackjack. He's fast as fuck. He'll get out on the lead if he doesn't break like shit. Then, I imagine his head just falling off with two furlongs to go.

I'm sure there will be some impressive, never before seen, way in which he loses.

Won't stop me from betting the farm on him though.

# posted by